Why He’s Hot {REDUX}:

1. Now who is that GQ motherfucker making with the bedroom eyes under those wayfarers? That’s Bradley Glenn Walker III, better known as Butch Walker, bitch! You giggling at the name? Just stare at that fine piece of Southern Comfort for a little bit longer. I bet you’re drooling by now.
2. Those gorgeous eyes, that beautiful smile, those colorful arms, those lanky legs, that wonderfully unique nose… Sorry, I lost myself for a second. It’s easy when someone is this gorgeous. And it helps that he’s hardly aged since 1991. He’s old enough to be your daddy and he doesn’t look a day over 25!
3. His accent. Butch is a good ol’ dorky Georgia boy who never forgot his roots. And that sweet as honey accent and goofy sense of humor is only the tip of the iceberg. He can be as charming and as polite as a Southern Gentleman and as dirty and wild as a Redneck. He’ll call you ‘darlin” during dinner, then start on those hundred dirty things to say and do to you afterwards.
4. This boy is one multi-talented motherfucker. Guitar, piano, bass, mandolin, banjolin, tambourine… not to mention that VOICE! It’s like a fine wine. It’s just gotten better as he’s aged. And fuck, you got a favorite song? Butch can play it for you no problem and probably do it BETTER. Even TSwift realizes her version of her own goddamn song pales in comparison to Butch’s cover. It’s how his fine ass got on the Grammys! Don’t want him covering a song for you? No problem! The songs he writes are even better. Hell, he can probably write it while drunk on wine and it’ll turn out better than your favorite song.
5. If all of that wasn’t sexy enough, he rides a motorcycle. I repeat… HE RIDES A MOTORCYCLE! I bet your panties are hitting the floor now. Just imagine coming and going (especially coming) with him on the back of one of his bikes. God knows I am!

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Why He’s Hot {REDUX}:

1. Jeremy Renner. How do I begin to describe Jeremy Renner? Let’s start at the top with that baby face. Did you know he’s 39 years old? 39 fucking years old! He’s always going to look younger than you and you’re just going to have to deal with that.
2. Let’s work our way down a little bit to his body. Sweet fancy Moses, his body. You saw The Hurt Locker, right? Then you know he wasn’t just defusing bombs; he was dropping bombs. Sexy bombs. If you’re not dead from the sexiness yet, just take a look at his arms. That ought to do it.
3. Listen, ladies, sometimes he has to cover up that body with some clothes. And boy does he cover it up nicely. This snappy dresser can wear the fuck out of a three-piece suit. He even looks hot in a bomb suit. Your boyfriend wishes he could pull off a fierce blue velvet blazer the way Mr. Renner does.
4. Oh, did I mention that he sings, too? Yeah, that’s right: handsome, built, stylish and a great singing voice. If your pants are still on, they won’t be on much longer after you hear him belt out New York State of Mind with Jimmy Fallon.
5. Last, but certainly not least, he’s a momma’s boy and proud of it. He could have his pick of any beautiful lady to take to the Oscars and he chose his momma. If that doesn’t warm your heart, then you must be dead inside.

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Why He’s Hot {REDUX}:

1. Who is that sexy Korean boy, looking straight at you, you ask? Who else than SHINee’s Flaming Charisma, Choi Minho! Asians aren’t for you? Why the hell not! Well, for sure this boy’s beauty will change those thoughts of yours.
2. Shhht! My boy’s rapping. Minho proves that his rapping skills are legit. You can tell that Mr. Choi Minho is a sexy beast. Listen to him rap. Listen to him rap in english. Listen to him sing. Listen to him sing in English. Has he melted you with his beautiful voice yet? I think he did without fail.
3. All Asians MUST be chinks you say? Minho doesn’t think so. Look at those big brown eyes of his. Are you pregnant yet? That’s how powerful his gaze is. Just by looking at you, he can impregnate you and those hot bothered girls around you. His eyes can do so much! He can stare into nothing, look directly at you and wink with those motherfucking seducing eyes of his. Wait, I forgot to say, “CONGRATULATIONS!” You have a tiny Minho within you;D
4. This boy looks good in just about anything. No joke. Whether he’s wearing farm - inspired clothes, hats, suits, glasses, colored skinny jeans, school uniform, a sleeveless trenchcoat, or even a girl, he’s damn sexy. Pshhh, and he knows it. 
5. When a boy can peform a girl song, attempt to be girl-like, yet he still has that manly aura. Damn, don’t you feel the urge to bite him? This boys aegyo plus girl dancing equals heaven! Oh, and have you seen him do some hoochie dancing? FUCK YES! I want more please;) Now that’s FLAMING CHARISMA at it’s finest.

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Why He’s Hot {REDUX}:

1. No one can epitomize the grandpa era 1960’s style better in a sharp suit and slicked hair, with a cigarette in one hand and bourbon on the other. He IS the sexiest man on primetime television… even the grannies are rockin’ their granny panties of approval.
2. There is a tacit intrigue ensconced in those smoldering olive eyes, coupled with a calm demeanor and gentlemanly charm in or out of persona. He’s a pleasurable guy who knows your desires, hinting a little and holding the rest back, leaving you with an unquenchable thirst for more…
3. He’s paid his dues and now reaps the rewards, but he isn’t letting the prestige muddle his head. A blend of invincibility and vulnerability, whether decked as clean-shaven cover debonair or scruffed in a down to earth casual. He inflects his candor with modesty and self-awareness, plus a manic sense of humor (and he digs math, lit & science!) which makes him all the more adorkable.
4. He can cook! What with a decade’s worth of waiting tables wouldn’t he pick up a thing or two in gastropornic satisfaction? That must also explain the delectable meat-and-muscles package.
5. He’s Jon Hamm. As in Jonathan Daniel Hamm — NOT John Ham or well, Sergio the Sax Symbol as you secretly lust him to be. Brusque, mysterious, brooding, romantic, dirty, funny, sexy. Heck, he can be James Bond and make mad love on my Vespa anytime.

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Why He’s Hot:

1. This fine piece of ass is Channing Tatum.  He was a fucking GI JOE FOR FUCK’S SAKE!  I would bang the hell out of him in that get up.
2. Channing can dance.  Like dance, dance.  Not dance in the - oh hey I want to dance, but I’m not good enough to so let me go on some reality dance show and look like a tool - dance but in the I’m Channing Tatum STFU, sit down, and watch me dance.  He can break it the fuck down, and it will make all of your panties wet.
3. His body.  His body.  Good grief his fucking body.  Not to mention those piercing eyes.  With that fucking combo your pants should already be off.  I mean, mine already are.
4. Nice bulge there Channing. I greatly approve.  I also approve of The Scruff.  My nether regions are tingling as we speak.
5. Channing used to strip.  Yes, you heard it right.  Channing used to STRIP.  Even Ellen gets all hot and bothered from it.  Hey Channing!  *scrounges for some cash* GET OVER HERE!!  You bitches better line up ‘cause I’m getting my lap dance first.

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