Why He’s Hot:

1. His snide manner - how he talks all smooth and careless, saunters around and cocks the half smile and melts you. He would look at you across a smoky bar and you’d want him to undress you with those piercing blue eyes so badly that subconciously you’d start dropping trou before you even realized it and then once you realized you had his attention you’d totally keep going. Then you’d get kicked out the bar for public indency but he’d follow you and you’d have rough sex in the alley. Yeeaaaahhh.
2. The bulge in his pants.
3. The bulge.
4. Uh, his acting? I dunno, I’m distracted now.
5. That fucking bulge. I mean how big is that man’s cock?! THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW.