Why He’s Hot: 

1. This motherfucker right here, ladies, is Mika. And it’s pronounced “Meeka,” not “My-ka,” fool. He’s basically the most attractive artist in the history of mankind and he knows it.
2. He’s fucking adorable. And downright handsome. At the same fucking time. Imagine waking up to this next to you in your bed. Now change your panties and keep reading.
3. His jawline. It’s fucking beautiful. It screams “I’m a fucking man now get over here so I can sex your brains out.”
4. His smile. It has the ability to make angels orgasm and mortals faint. It’s playful and sexy at the same time. It makes you smile just looking at it. This fucker could cheer you up after a long day at the office just by grinning. And then lay you down on the kitchen table for hot, passionate sex. You want him.
5. He’s wicked fucking talented. He sings, he dances, he draws, he writes, and he has this killer falsetto that caresses your ears AND your genitals. Plus he’s got this excellent British accent and he’s not stupid. There is nothing that you look for in a man that this man does not possess. WISDOM.

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Why He’s Hot: 

1. Who is this guy, standing there looking so good that it’s making you not give two shits whether those people around him are alive or dead, you ask? Oh, it’s ARTHUR. That’s right, Arthur. No, he doesn’t have a last name - he’s The Point Man. The best fucking Point Man there is. He doesn’t need a last name. 
2. Have you seen this sexy piece of ass in a suit? UMPH. You know you want this tall, lithe, well tailored son of a bitch strutting around in your presence, all ready for you to undress him.
3. Look at that hair. Look at that perfect damn hair. You know you want to slide your hand all through it, get your fingertips coated in gel or hairspray or pomade or whatever the hell he uses to make it all slicked back and sexy like that. Of course doing that will probably piss him off but trust me - that is a very good thing. 
4. Arthur will invade your dreams and give you rough sex like you’ve never had; he’ll suspend gravity and have you rotating in hallways and banging up against ceilings and shit - loving every minute of it too. You think Arthur gives a fuck about physics? Please. 
5. Three words: ARTHUR AND EAMES. Ariadne is irrelevant, kiss or no kiss.

1. See that handsome young man right up there? That’s Joey Michael Richter. Yeahhh. Let that name roll off your tongue. Go ahead. Practice. You’ll be moaning it soon anyway, because once you hear that kid’s sweet voice when he sings, you won’t be able to think of anything else but him moaning yours as you make sweet love.
2. He’s a Youtube-famous actor. Yeah, there’s a few of them out there—but how many have acted as Ron BAMF Weasley, the KICKASS best friend of Harry Freaking Potter, in both A Very Potter Musical AND A Very Potter Sequel? That’s right. Just him. His wig isn’t even that red and he still makes ginger look motherfucking good. Oh, and did I mention he was in a play called Me And My Dick? As himself? Ask nicely and he may just introduce you to the other main character.
3. He’s got a great sense of humor. He’ll make you die laughing while he’s fucking the fuck out of you. And all that adorable silliness gets him a ton of friends, who he hangs out with and drinks fucking beers in his fucking bathtub with. Does that look strange to you? Doesn’t matter, does it, because you just jizzed your pants either way.
4. Look at that adorable sideways jaw. Have you ever seen anything quite like it? No, you haven’t. Does he make it look fucking adorable? Fuck yes, he does. he’s the epitome of supermegafoxyawesomehot, with or without his fucking cute jaw—or with or without his fucking unnecessary shirt.
5. He’s attending the University of Michigan and is involved in a student-run organization called basement arts, but that’s all just for small talk before you’re being tossed mercilessly on the bed and pounded the fuck out of by that fucking cuter than life Joey Richter. And like the character Salad Sally in Me And My Dick, it won’t be long before he has you begging him to sweep you off your feet and carry you off to some Caribbean island and make wild passionate love to you until you die a naked and sexy death.

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Why He’s Hot: 

1. Why hello Ryan Kwanten! Aren’t you looking hot as hell today? Of course he is! Are you seeing this fine, fine male specimen before you? Everything from his arms, which look strong enough to sweep you off your feet, to his picture perfect chest, my man…excuse me, Ryan, is obviously the most fuckable guy anyone has ever laid eyes on.
2. HE’S AUSTRALIAN! Which means that well…he knows all about being down under, if you catch my drift. It also means that his accent is absolutely blissful, I mean honestly—imagine, you’re in the midst of passionate, animal sex and he yells out your name in that unbelievably beautiful voice of his.
3. His show, True Blood is on HBO for a reason. It’s just too hot for the eyes those not fortunate enough to be able to shell out the extra dough for the premium package. Speaking of premium packages…no, I’ll leave that for another point. As I was saying, this show is soft-core porn, and most of it is happening to Mr. Kwanten’s character, Jason Stackhouse. Let me put it this way, the opening scene of the entire series is Jason’s gorgeous blonde head buried in some bitch’s crotch. Yeah, and just think, all that sexual energy won’t got to waste either, I bet he has more than enough left for you my dears.
4. This demi-god is not afraid to go anywhere, or cross any lines. Apart from playing the womanizing Jason Stackhouse, he also played a kinda-sorta-totally kidnapping victim, who as Katy Perry would say on opposite day, “kissed a boy and liked it”. All that kink on screen and stage makes me wonder what he’s into between the sheets. Hmm, what a lovely thought, don’t push it away, give in!…just remember, bathroom’s on the right.
5. This. You can thank me after you take care of your lady boner.

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Why He’s Hot:

1. Christian Mother Fucking Kane is his name. You’ve seen him as Lindsey McDonald in Angel, the young Hub in Secondhand Lions, Peter Prentiss in Just Married, and of course Eliot Spencer in Leverage.
2. This man can sing. I mean seriously. He’s not just an ordinary country singer, his voice is filled with so much passion and soul that he has one of the most unique voices around.
3. Have you seen this man’s arms? He is ripped. Should I even mention the rest of his body? Just take a gander at this. I’ll take a minute before proceeding so you can pick up those panties.
4. Holding onto those panties tight? Well you’re going to need it because the way he kisses is just so passionate and sexy, you’re clit with throb. Oh, and those hands? I can just hear vaginas across the world screaming to have those sexy phalanges inside them.
5. Okay, okay I’ll give your clit a rest. So let us marvel on how adorable he is. That smile? You can’t tell me that’s not cute. Him + animals = THE CUTEST THING EVER.

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